One day it shall come to pass that the woodwinds and trumpets will all be cowed
by the awesomeness of the trombone section. On this day, snow and hail shall fall from the summer sky and fire shall
rise from the depths of the earth. All will be humbled by the perfectly tuned, heavenly chords emitted by the section
of the trombones.
It shall be that the trombones shall rule over all the flutes, clarinets, saxophones,
trumpets, and percussion. Respect shall be given to the People of the Slide.
On this day, the angels shall be commmanded by God to cast down their trumpets
and replace them with Stradivarius Bach gold trombones. All melodies shall be taken from the trumpets and woodwinds,
and given to the long begotten section of the brass that play low, for they shall reign supreme.
Conductors will marvel at the skill of this seciton, whose members will perform
three hundred fold better.
The "Section of the Sections" they will be called, for the section of trombones
shall truly be the best. The trumpets and clarinets will forsake their claims to the title for their eyes will be opened.
Let it be known that the Prophecy of the Trombones is self-fulfilling. So, for now, the People of the Slide, the Section
of Sections, the mighty trombones.....SHALL SLACK!
